Toasted Tweets | Oct. 5, 2016 Edition

We spend many waking hours gathering and cataloging mundane trivia (admit it; you’ve Googled Kim Kardashian’s weight, Miley Cyrus’s favorite color and Brad Pitt’s penis size) but if you add weed, useless questions all of a sudden become fascinating, deep and even meaningful to this adventure called life.


Today we discuss (and question) self-love, self-care, the benefits of left-handed toking, misspeaking, edibles, existentialism and more, all through the eyes (and fingertips) of the stoner.


You know how to play—spark up a fatty and peruse and enjoy the pressing, stupid, funny, confounding and basic thoughts that emanate from the minds of those who love pot and happen to have a Twitter account.






It's easy to name pot strands, just pick a color and then your favorite act of nature – Red Thunderstorm, Yellow Hurricane etc



— Jessica Delfino (@jessicadelfino) October 3, 2016







Sometimes I get so high & I tell myself "Thanks for existing"



— Cat Fish (@kornicle) August 20, 2016







When I smoke pot, I smoke with my left hand, so it feels like I'm smoking with a stranger.



— David Bluvband (@Bluvband) May 27, 2016







Smoking weed is like putting vegetables in your lungs



— Asshat Supreme (@armthebeefaroni) August 25, 2016







i'm not the biggest stoner in the world. i'm roughly average size



— onlyastoner (@onlyastoner) August 31, 2016







im so high right now, somebody sneezed and I said goodnight



— bigemptySB (@dereckiriefuck) September 15, 2016







New tv show: The Deadliest Batch. A game show about who can eat more extremely potent weed brownies and not throw up



— Cody Furin (@ydocniruf) September 13, 2016







Drinking by yourself = no fun

Smoking weed by yourself = a blast



— Kordell Dryden (@KordellDryden) March 23, 2016







How many bong rips does it take to get to the center of the universe?



— ひCloutひKing Melo (@IlluminatedDope) September 25, 2016







I lump people into two categories:



Sativa and Indica.



— Lizard Queen (@AmnesiaRose) September 30, 2016











by Mary Jane Gibson at High Times