Dear Hyapatia,

I’ve had some stress in my life recently and it’s affecting my sex life. I’ve never had a problem like this before. I’m young, 28. So I don’t think my age has anything to do with it. I think it’s all this stress. I’ve tried looking at porn to get me started, but I’m afraid my girlfriend will catch me. I don’t want her to think that she isn’t enough for me. Should I see a doctor for some Viagra? – Max

Dear Max.

First off, a bout of impotence is not unusual. Most men experience it at some point in their lives. If you feel it’s your stress that’s interfering with your performance, then it most likely is. You need to work on calming down and de-stressing. Looking for more erotic things to turn you on is a temporary fix. Drugs and doctors are expensive, which bury the symptom of your real problem – stress! If you don’t address the real problem, eventually other symptoms will arise, possibly in the form of digestive issues, headaches, high blood pressure, etc. Try to determine the source of your stress. How can you fix your situation? Can you lessen your stress? Can you find a better way to deal with it, if it can’t be changed? The more you worry about your sexual performance, the more you add to your stress. Try calming teas, massage, meditation and, of course, weed! If this doesn’t help and sex becomes another source of stress, then yes, I’d talk to a doctor to get you through – for as short a time as is possible. An orgasm is a stress-reducer. Our bodies release oxytocin and endorphins that are essential for achieving happiness and peace. If you can’t get release, you get stuck in a vicious cycle. Try the natural route first. If you decide to use pharmaceuticals, keep their use to a minimum.

Dear Hyapatia,

My girlfriend was very unhappy with her last job, so I understood when she decided she wanted to quit. That was almost two months ago. She still hasn’t gotten another job and I’m wondering how much longer we can last on just my income. We have already cut back to just one joint a day. I love her, but I can’t go on like this much longer. I need my weed! How can I encourage her to find another job without sounding like I’m being pushy? I love her and she’s so good to me, especially in bed. I don’t want to lose her, but we can’t get by on just one income. – Jake

Dear Jake,

Sit down with her when you’re ready to smoke that joint. Start by telling her how much you love and appreciate her. Show her how your budget works without her working and explain that you can’t get by on just one income. Regardless of how wonderful she is to you, if you keep going like this, a time will come when you’ll resent her for not contributing financially and the sacrifices it causing. She’ll feel better about herself if she finds a job that she’s comfortable with. Her self-esteem will increase when she’s successful at a job and helping to bring home the bacon to make the relationship work. She needs to realize that if she were alone, she’d have to find a job quickly. Ultimately, I think she will understand. She sounds like the kind of person who would feel guilty living off of you – even if the house is spotless and she has sex with you three times a day!

Dear Hyapatia,

I’m sick and tired of living in a red state. Just about everyone around here voted for Trump and we didn’t even have marijuana on the ballot. Some people are acting like they got a stamp of approval to be intolerant. My boyfriend is black and I’m half Latina. I have family in Florida and he has medical problems, so I think he could get a medical card. Do you think we should move? – Lenora

Dear Lenora,

That’s entirely up to you. I can tell you that when I moved from Indiana to Colorado, my entire outlook changed. It was like moving out from under a dark rain cloud. I found people more open-minded, more tolerant of others and basically happier. Of course, I can’t say the same would happen for you. Be aware that it takes time for states to implement their new policies and while it may be legal, dispensaries may be scarce or even nonexistent. Florida is in that situation now. If you can’t move yet, focus on your love for each other. Surround yourself with family and friends. In the meantime, get high and have some great sex.

Dear Hyapatia,My friends and I live in California and we just got legal recreational weed! I’m so excited and can’t wait to see the competition kick in so prices can start dropping. My friends and I all got together last night. Everyone brought weed and we all got high as fuck. It was a blast! Everyone was so happy and excited. We all see a bright future where weed will be legal across the country soon. Some people have said things could get bad under Trump. I read an article that said the rural people voted for him because the economy is so bad for them. If farmers grew hemp for cloth, biofuel, solvents, plastics and paper, they could ship their product to manufacturers and their economy would rebound. Just a thought. – Marcus

Dear Marcus,

Very good idea! Hemp is a part of American history and it’s absolutely ridiculous that farmers are not permitted to grow hemp. Of course, not everyone is a farmer. Reviving the economy in neglected areas of America is going to take a lot more than just hemp.